You are so wrong and you know it.

  So...

  I haven't seen the kids since November.  Kendall told me that I would receive papers and never did, nor was I ever served with any papers telling me I had court.  I think I was lied to, because I definitely would have known by now.

  But that is not what prompts this post.  I could hear my son, call Will daddy.  And it honestly pisses me off.  It really fucking bothers me, when my son isn't seeing his father and his step-father is referred to as daddy.  Like a complete replacement.  I didn't ask for this, nor do I deserve any of this shit and I think I'm getting to the point where I've had enough.  I haven't made many attempts with a lawyer for one reason and one only...  money.  I have none and the little I'll be getting back for tax season is to go to getting a car.  This just isn't easy.  It kills my soul and only makes me hate the person I used to love with all my heart.  She's doing this and knows exactly what she's doing.  Man does it irk me.  I need to come up with some sort of battleplan and I need to see it through, before I am erased completely from their lives.  I can feel her making those plans.  I really can and there's no way I'm going to allow it.  I don't care how much she tries to normalize the situation.  I won't allow this.

  She's encouraging the "daddy" and I know it now.

  I have no idea where to start...  fuck.

~John